


Mayfly-December

by MiniNephthys



Series: Infinite Apology Loop [4]
Category: Fate/Zero, Fate/stay night (Visual Novel)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-08-28
Updated: 2011-08-28
Packaged: 2017-10-23 04:08:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/246132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiniNephthys/pseuds/MiniNephthys
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Two issues of growing old.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mayfly-December

Issei knew some kind of conversation with his father was inevitable. He wasn't sure what it was going to be like, or about, or anything. He just knew that his father Wanted To Talk.

"Issei, your boyfriend isn't getting any older."

Issei barely paused in doing the dishes. "Does that bother you?"

His father's frown deepened. "A little. Most people get older after you've known them for a few years."

He shrugged and ignored the frantic speech of someone else flooding his mind. "He isn't most people."

"Does he just age well?" The temple head sounded skeptical.

"Actually, he's a spirit I summoned a while back, so his body is fixed in that state," Issei explained. "Could you pass me the dish towel over there?"

His father passed him the dish towel. "Huh. That makes sense."

"Of course it does. Who managed to get this much tomato sauce stuck on this plate?"

"Who do we have that's a messy eater? You should know better than to ask."

"Ugh. I'll have to lecture him again..." After finishing up the dishes, Issei told his father that he was returning to his room and bid him farewell.

Lancer materialized as soon as he shut the door, clearly aghast. " _Ryudo-dono._ "

"It's rude to try and interrupt a conversation with my father, even if he can't hear you." Issei chuckled. "What is it you were saying? I think it was something about how I can't just tell people what I'm doing?"

"Something very similar to that." Lancer rubbed his temple, a typical sign of stress for him. "It isn't my place to question you, of course, but what were you thinking?"

"I was thinking that I can't keep up any story but the truth for long." Issei wandered through the room as he spoke, eventually stopping at the photographs on his desk, full of smiling faces: those of his family, his fellow monks, his friends, and his lover. "It's been a few years, Lancer. How long do you want to stay?"

"As long as you would have me," came the automatic reaction.

Issei picked up one of the photos and examined it closely instead of watching Lancer. "And how long do you think that is?"

Lancer paused. "...I don't know," he admitted honestly. "How long?"

"A long time. I'm twenty years old, Lancer. I don't look like I did when I was seventeen, and it's been only three years since I summoned you. How much different will things be for me in five or ten years? For that matter, in Japan, a typical man can expect to live to reach nearly eighty. How will you look in sixty years?" Issei turned back to his Servant, but his expression showed no anger or resentment.

Lancer swallowed against the lump in his throat. "I had assumed you would be rid of me long before it became an issue."

"You should know not to assume these things." Issei beckoned Lancer over until he could lightly kiss him for just a moment. "I adore you for far more reasons than your looks. I can understand if you want to leave because I'll become old and grey while you do not, but that will never be a reason for me to push you away."

"I could never leave you for as shallow a reason as that." Lancer's fond smile was always capable of making Issei's heart pound. "Until you see fit to have me leave, I can stay."

"...We really will have to deal with other people asking questions, though," Issei muttered.

"I tried to warn you."  


* * *

  
"L...Lancer."

With his eyes shut as he tried to stay comfortable and relatively still on the hospital bed, Issei would have had to rely on Lancer taking his hand to know that he had materialized if he had not had the utmost faith that he would come to him whenever asked. "I'm here."

Issei's voice was hoarse. "Remember all of those times that we talked about me not wanting you to go?"

"I remember." As soft as possible. Perhaps the words were sent more through their mental connection than through speech; he was too tired now to distinguish between them.

The words he had thought he would never say slowly left his mouth. "I'm changing that. You can go now. I don't want you here any longer."

Lancer's sharp intake of breath; Issei could only imagine what dark fears had returned. "Why-"

"Because I don't want you to watch me die."

...And perhaps Lancer's expression would have been more painful than the sickness, if he had seen it. "I cannot abandon you like this!"

"Are you refusing a command?" Issei asked.

He had expected the hesitation, but not the answer. "...Yes. I refuse to follow this order you have given me."

Issei smiled at that, almost as brightly as he would have long ago. "I would have been so happy to hear that from you in any other situation. But, I cannot accept it now. My absolute orders, Lancer." Power flowed through him, centered at the three marks on his left arm. For a moment or two, he could feel strong again. "That you should find a good Master. That you should find happiness. And that you should move on."

One by one, the Command Spells were wasted on what no magecraft could force, and with them the bond keeping Lancer in the world was severed. Issei opened his eyes just enough to take in the horrified look on Lancer's face.

"How can you order those things of me?" Lancer asked him, trembling. "I already found the best of all possible Masters, and more happiness than I deserved."

Weren't they meant to do even the impossible? But he had no breath to argue that now; those commands had taken the last out of him, and his throat worked futilely.

He let his eyelids slip closed again, and felt the faintest touch upon his lips before it disappeared. Smiling still, Issei drifted into sleep.


End file.
